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Monday, April 7, 2014

Anxiety attack

Goshhh. I might be overthinking over everything. I don't know. I haven't been sleeping well again. And I've been having nightmares recently. 

It's super pathetic how I experience so much bullshit at this age. Like who the fuck prescribes anti-depressant to 15 year olds. I'm pretty glad that all that stupid counseling is over. I still remember I had to rush to IMH for my stupid pyschatric counseling. Then MCYS (now known as MSF) for my pyschological counseling. Like wtf man. Makes me feel like i'm mentally unsound. Maybe I am. I don't know. 

So what if I'm suffering from anxiety and drepression. I'm still normal and I think I'm wayyyy mature than most people. Contradicting uh? Hahah. I'm like that. Anyways, I'll make this post a little bit more happy. 

So I decided to start my 100 happy days journey today with Fir. Did I mention how tough was it? I envy people who are genuinely happy everyday. I used to be like that. Used to. I used to be able to smile no matter what bullshit is thrown at me. Now I'm just...dead? 

Okay enough negativity, once again. Gosh I really need to be more positive! 

Alright, let's see what happened today. I made banana pancakes for myself which tasted freaking disgusting. Okay lahh, not that bad lah. Just a little bit too thick. Hahaah... Still felt dizzy in school today but I managed to survive. Was falling asleep during history lesson hahah. Me and Princeton were sleeping in the same position hahahah! So funny. Had SS mock exam after school which I didn't even knew about. So I practically flunked it. After that I had an awesome talk with Fir about boys. Hahahah! We still haven't started on our 100 days vlog also. Hahah! It's okay lah. The memories in our brains are more precious . 

Now I naturally feel better just talking about good things. I should really keep this habit. 

Ohmygosh. Just thinking about school makes me wanna strangle myself man. Although I'm actually looking forward to school tmrw. Hahah, because of the time-out programme lahh. Hahah! I really feel like that's the time to be myself. And really just express myself. But afterwards I have English Oral. But i'm pretty confident that I can score an A1 for it. 

Alright! That's pretty much all I have for now! 

100 Days Of Happiness. :) 

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