Perks of dating me

Another sleepless night thanks to my dickhead brother. Felt like blogging, so I have a really funny topic to blog about. :P

I'm gonna list down 7 perks of dating me. This is is kinda like an AA (attract attention) topic. Go ahead and call me despo if you want. Cause I just might be. :D

1. I'm pretty ugly. That's a plus point for you cause no one would want me except for you. I mean, ugly people deserves a chance too right?

2. I'll be fucking over attached to you. Trust me. It seems like a bad thing. Yeah, I know. But I'm not clingy to an extent where I won't allow you to talk to girls (That doesn't mean I won't get jealous uh). But seriously, I'll be fucking addicted to you when I'm in love. Honestly, that's a bad thing for me, cause when we break up, I got nothing left. Which brings me to my next point.

3. I give you my all (Except for my nudes and virginity, boy you're not getting any of that, till we get married at least). I'll be your listening ear, your shoulder to cry on, the person who makes you smile. I'll do my best to be the best girlfriend but seriously, if you ever compare me to another girl, you better run cause I will fucking shove a knife up your anus. Back to the point. I give you my all, only because you're worth it.

4. You'll definitely lose weight because I want soccer dates. If you don't already know, I'm crazy about soccer. So I expect you to play soccer with me. Blehh~ If you hate soccer, fuck off.... Just kidding, we can always just play for fun and spend the next 1 hour laughing our asses off at the way you kick. I mean, I'm not that good either, so we'll just be laughing at each other.

5. You get free food. (Yeah, right after exercising. :P) I cook quite often for no reason. Some are really nice and some taste like shit. HAHAHAH! So, pray that whatever I cook will be good.

6. YOU'RE MY SEX BOMB. Omg, hahahaha! I'm listening to it now. Let's skip to 7.

7. Lastly, I promise that I will always stay faithful to you, love you with all my heart. Yes, we may not last, or there might be some problems along the way. But whatever it is, if we make a decision to be together, I think it's necessary we give our best to each other. I sound pretty despo/cheesy and this point of time, but I'm just being real serious. I don't get why people actually cheat on their partners. I'd rather not have a boyfriend in that case because that way, I can flirt with whoever I want. And for goodness sake, that's not being flirty. You have every right to flirt anyway. People nowadays just jump into a relationship without realizing that they have to be committed and sometimes sacrifice some things. This is just my personal opinion. So if you got a problem with it, go screw yourself :P, cause it's my opinion.  Back to the point, I will love you unconditionally, accept all your flaws (But seriously, if it's negative, you better change it, and don't ever use that against me, I'm just trying to help you be a better person), love you for who you are.

BUT, one thing I wanna emphasize, writing all these doesn't mean I choose my boyfriend randomly. Obviously I would wanna know you better first then consider being with you. I don't wanna get myself into a hot mess for nothing. I'm pretty choosy anyway. Hahah... Not forgetting that I already like someone :'D.

Miss him like mad, but whatever. I'll wait for the right time. :) That's all for now I guess.

I wonder who actually reads my blog. Like do I even blog about relevant things? I want to blog as someone who provides advices to people's problem, something like Aunt Agony. But I don't know. I need to know that people are interested. So if you're reading this, comment pls! Remain anonymous if you want to! :) Thank you so much! Will keep y'all updated.